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V:3 I’m jealous of my wife. There’s no reason for it. I know I’m going to lose her if I don’t quit.

Jealousy had gotten the best of Olivia. She wasn’t jealous of her husband, Gavin, but she was jealous of any woman who looked at him. Gavin’s comment to us was, “She’s even jealous when I play with the kids. Frankly, I just want to run, but I need to save my marriage for their sake. If I left, she’s do everything she could to keep me from seeing them.”

Gavin was determined to do something to save their marriage. Olivia refused to go to a professional in the mental health field, but she liked our books, so Gavin thought that perhaps we could help her.

In reality, we found that Gavin was doing the exact same thing to his wife. Though she’d never been with anyone else, and although she made sure he was with her when she went anywhere and clearly was in love with the man – he was really jealous. It all came to a head when after church they got into a huge argument because she’d talked to a guy in their small group meeting. Yes, Gavin had been right there in the room. No, they hadn’t been talking about anything but the preacher’s morning message. Yes, when Gavin walked up, she pulled him in close and put her arm around him.

Jealousy is not love. It is rooted in fear. Fear is the catalyst for insecurities that create cracks in a solid marriage. Insecurity, in turn, results in possessiveness, and the need to control. Possessiveness and the need to control evidence themselves in jealous behavior. Jealousy will choke the life out of any relationship and can drive even the most devoted partner away, because it creates a prison – not just for the person who is jealous but his/her partner as well.

The root of all jealousy is fear. Fear generates insecurity. Insecurity, in turn, results in possessiveness, and the need to control. Possessiveness and the need to control evidence themselves in jealous behavior. Jealousy will choke the life out of any relationship and can drive even the most devoted partner away, because it creates a prison – not just for the person who is jealous but his/her partner as well. Jealousy does not always turn into abuse but if left unchecked it can. In 1984, a movie entitled The Burning Bed starred the late Farrah Fawcett as the battered wife of a jealous, controlling husband and startled the viewing world. In real life, rock legend Tina Turner, who left an abusive marriage, wrote the story of her miseries in I, Tina, from which the movie, What’s Love Got to Do with It? was made in 1993. If you’re a jealous person, and you want your marriage to survive, we’ll say it as bluntly as we know how – you need to do whatever it takes to get rid of the green-eyed giant. Do not let it take control of your marriage.

Even marriages that are strong in every other way can succumb to jealousy. They seem to have a need to fasten an iron grip on people, jobs, ideas and attitudes and tighten that grip if anything starts to slip. They can crush the life out of the people and projects they are associated with by smothering them. These people have to learn how to react properly if they want to preserve their position in life and save their marriages.

Gentle and levelheaded people can even be effected by jealous feelings. Their jealousy evidences itself in dependency. Others soon tire of their clinging and feel suffocated by their possessiveness, so they find excuses not to be around them. They, too, need lessons on how to save their marriages.

Even gentle people can be jealous if they are insecure and fearful. Their jealousy evidences itself in dependency. Others soon tire of their clinging and feel suffocated by their possessiveness, so they find excuses not to be around them. Even the other partner needs to have support to make a change. Envy and jealousy can occur in your relationships with everyone. If you haven’t conquered the demon, you may be unkind toward your spouse’s relatives – especially your mother-in-law. You may even be envious of your husband’s or wife’s successes.

This miserable emotion eats at its possessor. It is like a cancer that gnaws at relationships. Jealousy turns otherwise beautiful people to become dark and ugly.

You can save your marriage. Go to www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com. Get rid of jealousy. Our marriage saving material is exactly what you need.

Go to www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com. Get rid of jealousy. Our marriage saving material is exactly what you need. Dr. Vance Hardisty International Speaker and Author Margaret Hardisty International Best Selling Author and Speaker Love Relationship Headquarters www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com

Your marriage has value, Save your marriage today, and receive separate help for men. Check here for free reprint licence: Eliminate Your Jealousy!.